Everyone is invited to witness nuptials of gay, Black couple deeply connected to church – Hartford Courant

The Rev. Darrell Goodwin and Kentavis “Kenny” Brice have 200 friends and family members coming to their “Black, gay” wedding at Asylum Hill Congregational, but they are hoping hundreds more show up.

In the name of activism and affirmation, the faith-filled couple has extended an invitation to the world to witness the Oct. 29 nuptials.

“We have decided to open our wedding up to the public as an act of activism to interrupt the absence of images of Black, gay love, and particularly Black, gay love in the context of faith,” Goodwin said. “We also want to offer the community the possibility to support a marriage that we know will receive some great negativity and critique in our world.”

Those who can’t make it in person to the church that holds 800 will be able to watch the ceremony via livestream, as the couple has captured the attention of the world through social media, with guests interested in watching from Asia, Africa and Europe.

The wedding ceremony will take place at 3:15 p.m. The reception will be private because of space limitations.

The Rev. Erica Thompson, senior minister at the church, who will give welcoming remarks, said they’ve had Black weddings and gay weddings, but this is the first Black, “same-gender loving” wedding.

“I love the idea of inviting public witness into the experience of love and joy,” she said. “As two men of color, I think there are lots of layers to their relationship that are positive. We need more of that in the world today.”

Their love story began when the two met in the spring of 2019.

Goodwin was living in Nebraska to begin his role as associate conference minister and had reached out to community leaders about potential partnerships. Brice, a MixxedFit master educator, agreed to meet him about potentially offering a gospel dance fitness class.

That night, the men shut down the lounge after a three-hour conversation and, according to a personal wedding website featuring their history, “Darrell left boldly asking Kentavis for a goodbye kiss, which he obliged to give a few times.”

Five months later, their friendship had evolved into romance.

In March 2020, they decided to quarantine together during the pandemic. It was during those countless hours together their bond strengthened.

In June of 2021 in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico, Goodwin, proposed to Brice in the most romantic way. There were red roses sprinkled about and a sign in big white letters that read, “Will you Marry Me?”

Brice quickly said, “Yes.”

Brice said one of the most striking qualities he saw in Goodwin when they first became friends was his ability to connect with people and his love of people no matter their circumstances.

“If he’s sharing something, he’d give you the biggest piece,” Brice said of Goodwin. “He’s thoughtful, inclusive, loving. I also love his million-dollar smile.”

Goodwin said he is inspired by Brice’s faith, sense of justice and commitment to family.

“When we met the first time Kenny committed to travel with me to churches so I would be safe,” Goodwin said. “I was an openly gay Black man in Nebraska.”

Goodwin said he and Brice realized as Black men they have few models and images of Black love, especially same-gender love.

Goodwin, 41, is the executive conference minister of the Southern New England Conference of the United Church of Christ. Goodwin’s career entails working with staff to equip, serve and empower 615 churches in Connecticut, Rhode Island, and Massachusetts. The churches are open and affirming to the LBGTQ community.

Brice, 31, statewide coordinator of foster care health clinics for the Department of Children and Families, said the message they want to send is, “God loves you just the way you are.”

“We want to show love, inclusivity,” Brice said. “This is not something you see every day. What a blessing.”

The men, Bloomfield residents, will wear black and gold suits and welcome guests from around the country, including their mothers and Goodwin’s grandmother, Roberta Harris, who lives with them.

“I’m so excited,” Harris, 86, said. “I can’t wait until this wedding happens. I love my grandson, and now I’m getting another grandson. “

Asked how she feels about the open invitation that could bring hundreds of strangers, Harris said, “I just hope they’re as excited as I am.”

Brice’s mom, Delisa Monroe, who will travel from Nebraska for the wedding, said she understands the two men want everyone to know how they feel about one another.

“Being a Christian myself, I like when people express themselves. I don’t think the world should influence them,” Monroe said. “I’m just excited because they’re going to do what they want to do.”

Goodwin’s mom, Brenda Lee Goodwin of Minnesota, said she’s on board with the open invite.

“I think if they want to express themselves in times of all this hatred, it’s welcome,” she said. “They want to open up their heart to the world. I can’t wait till that day to see two become one and stand on their beliefs.”

Officiating at the wedding will be The Rev. Andrea Vassell, who serves as bishop-elect for global ministries of The Fellowship of Affirming Ministries. Vassell, whom Goodwin said is Black and same-gender loving, is a former UCC pastor and close friend.

“When we choose to step out of the narrow of life, we allow others to do the same,” Vassell said. “Darrell and Kentavis are doing just that.”

Goodwin said when he and Brice posted their open wedding plans on Facebook, within 24 hours people from all over the world responded.

The post received 1,000 engagements and 700 comments.

Goodwin said 99% of the comments were positive. People said they were inspired, became hopeful and felt joy. They had so many requests to stream the ceremony, they decided to do so.

“We were touched that so many people were impacted by us,” Goodwin said.

Goodwin said they’ve already received some messages of hate.

“We want to drown those messages out with the community showing up and supporting us publicly and authentically,” he said.

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