Being gay isn’t and shouldn’t be the only thing you are, avoid being … – The Torch

Being gay is not an entire personality. It should not even be a primary facet of someone’s personality. This sounds like an absurd idea, given that for many years the LGBTQ+ community has fought hard to even be able to get married to who they love. People, by default, are different from one another, and hold parts of their personal identity tighter or looser than others around them. But placing one solid identifier to explain all that a person is, all that you are, is inherently a bad thing. You put yourself in a box in terms of who you are, and what you can do when generalizing yourself.

No person is just one thing. I have met many great people who have more facets of their personality outside of their being homosexual. They are smart and funny. Good at sports and bad at public speaking. Looking at all of these things paints the picture of a diverse person, it lets you know who they are and has nothing to do with who they are attracted to. Sexuality gives a deeper connection to people, it gives a community of people who have lived similar experiences. But it does not make you who you are. Those experiences shape you, and those experiences can come from the person being attracted to the same gender, but being attracted to the same gender doesn’t make a person different from others. Saying that it does is outdated, homophobic and wrong.

This idea is not novel and new. We can see people all the time taking a small part of a hobby they have and ingraining it deep into their own personality. Vegans who trash others who are not vegan simply because of what they choose to eat are a good example of this, or band kids who stop talking to one of their friends simply because they dropped out of band. These people have become so focused on a single minute detail of their personality that it has taken over their life, and left a negative feeling for some that come into contact with them. They’ve become walking stereotypes for a small part of who they truly are as a person.

If we can agree that we are not just stereotypes, then we agree that we are different from those around us. So why should people of the LGBTQ+ community find their sexuality to be either their entire or the majority of their personality? It isn’t. They are whole people with thoughts, hobbies and ideas that have nothing to do with who they are attracted to. While it is true that they have opinions that are shaped by their sexuality at times, it is still important to note that homosexuality is not the only reason they have those opinions. 

The views expressed are those of the writer and do not necessarily reflect those of The Torch.