‘A Postcard From Our Future’ – The New York Times

As a deaf woman who relies on reading lips to communicate, Elspeth said mask mandates had made it difficult for her to find a new job. While she hopes one day there will be increased federal support for both universal child care and more accessible employment, in the meantime, she said, she had let go of any plans for another child.

Looking abroad for a solution

Lynn Hirose, 23, from Chiba, Japan, thinks having one child might be possible — thanks to a Roomba or an international move.

As a student at the University of Tokyo, Lynn sits between two worlds. “In Japan, balancing work and child rearing is really difficult. Many of my friends who aren’t in university hope to quit their jobs after finding a man,” she said, decisions that she noted were in response to a social expectation that women are responsible for the majority of domestic work in the country.

But at Japan’s most elite university, where male Japanese students outnumber female Japanese students four to one, Lynn said many of her peers weren’t planning to compromise their career ambitions with the demands of child care. As Motoko Rich, Tokyo bureau chief for The New York Times, explained in our episode on Wednesday, Japan has one of the highest work force participation rates of women and one of the lowest domestic participation rates from men. As a result, Lynn said “more than 80 percent” of her female friends at the university didn’t plan on having children.

“My male friends in U-Tokyo are aware of the problem and the need to balance a future partner’s job with housework,” she said, adding that while some “say they want to have a double-income family, that’s not standard. Others say they want their wives to be waiting for them when they get home.” (Lynn noted heterosexuality is considered the norm in Japan. “There is almost no support,” for gay, lesbian or transgender people, she said.)

Still, she holds out hope that having a child and pursuing a doctorate might be possible for her. When asked how she will make it work, she said she saw promise in innovations, like Roombas and washing machines, that are automating some housework. In the meantime, though, she’s weighing a move abroad. “I’d like to work in a better environment than Japan in terms of gender equality and flexibility for working mothers.”